King Sized Roofies

Nic and Richard are going on a camping company camping trip. The room assignments are sent out and Nic and Richard are to share a king-sized bed. Co-workers make fun of Nic and Richard. While Nic and Richard don't care, [HR Manager] decides to split them up so people will stop making fun of them.

Nic: I wish we could have kept the king bed and just took turns sleeping in a tent outside.

Richard: I don't think a king bed will fit in my tent

Nic: Sounds like a personal problem to me.

Richard: Well, this is my cry for help.

Nic: You should try faking suicide.

Richard: I don't do that anymore every time I do I end up with a hospital bill I don't remember.

Nic: Same reason I don't go on dates anymore.

Inside of Nic's Head

The Scene: Nic and Richard are sitting outside at Sonic. One of the customers drives off and after they pass Nic bursts out laughing. Richard looks at Nic questioningly.

Nic: No... nothing...

Richard: ...

Nic: It's just... when you see an old man and a young kid riding together in a car... do you ever wonder if their bodies might have been switched?

Richard: Like Freaky Friday!!!

Nic: Exactly!

Living Aquatically

Richard: [Co-worker] just told everyone in my department that I love seahorses.

Nic: Maybe you should stop talking about them ALL THE F***ING TIME!

Bro-Love

Nic: Are you alright dude?

[Drummer]: Yeah, I'm fine.

Nic: Are you sure? Do you need a hug?

[Drummer]: No.

Nic: Do you need a bro-pat?

[Drummer]: No...

Nic: Oh...

Do you need a bro-kiss?

[Drummer]: NO!

Richard: Well maybe Nic wants one! Ever think of that?!

Nic: Yeah! Maybe I'm asking for a reason, [Drummer]!